Wednesday, January 27, 2010

there is a light at the end of our tunnel!

Well, my husband and I received some good news yesterday when we met with our social worker. Exciting news. We just might be getting out of this house sooner than we thought. He told her that I was going to kill somebody soon if we didn't get out. And what was funny was when I got to talk to her, she mentioned wanting to get us out of my parents' house and I said, 'Yeah, cos I'm gonna kill somebody soon!' We've got a bit of research to do but her number one goal for us to is to get us out of here.
My husband said we'd move into our own place and we could visit all the time and my response was, "I don't ever want to come back here to see these people." I got to talk to my best friend earlier and I was able to unload a bit on him. He agrees. I need to get out of here now because there's no telling what I'll do next.
Today began with my dad complaining about the pipe in the sink in the bathroom that we use. For as long as I can remember that same pipe makes this sound when you turn the hot water on. Apparently the sound has spread to the other pipes in the house. My response? "It's YOUR fault. You were the one who decided to shut off all the hot water to fix it. So YOU made it spread." He responded with banging and slamming stuff around in the kitchen. I decided that THAT was where my brother got it from-not knowing how to be an adult.
As you can see, I don't take any crap from my parents. I honestly never have. I told my sil that I think I'm the only one that will say stuff back to my parents. They have no right to speak to me the way they sometimes do. I'm not a little kid. I'm an adult. She had trouble living here with my brother and my niece and do you want to know why? It's because my dad is awful (which you already kind of knew). If he has a problem with you (though if you confront him about said problem he'll deny, deny, deny.) he won't tell you to your face-particularly if you are not his own child. He'll allow it to build up inside of him and then he'll tell say me or my brother (if it's regarding my husband or his wife). It'll go like this, "Tell ___ not to ____ because___" That is what happened when my brother was living here with his wife and the monkey. Now, if this were being told to me, my response is typically, "YOU have a mouth. Use it. If you have a problem with so and so tell them yourself. I am NOT going to speak for you." My brother's response? He'd go and tell his wife whatever it was that bugged my dad and tell her what my dad wants her to do to fix it. It got SO bad when they were living here, that my dad would write the most evil notes to her. And you know what? My brother never stood up for her.  I totally think that my dad was the catalyst to their marital problems. In my sil's eyes, it felt as though my brother wasn't respecting her because he wasn't standing up for her. And that's just wrong.
I wanted to tell my dad sooooooooooooo badly that he was the first source of their problems but I bit my tongue. I wanted to tell him that it is his horrible attitude that makes his children not want to be around. I also feel as though that since his own son couldn't man up, it's his fault as a father for not teaching his son HOW to be a man.
On the knitting front (great segueway, I know!), I actually finished my super cupcake cowl!! I bound off, gave her a bath and then decided I didn't like the bind off I did so I ripped back and did an elastic bind off. The pattern doesn't say to do one, but I think it's better now. Instead of making it 11.75 inches, I went with 11 inches. Off to blocking she'll go and hopefully I'll be able to share some pictures soon!

10 comments:

  1. oh hon, I am so sorry everything is so crappy for you right now!! Hang in there - things are bound to get better soon- I'll be saying prayers for you and dh. ((((HUGS)))

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  2. That sucks! You guys really deserve things to turn around right now!

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  3. I'm de-lurking to say, hang in there! Things will work out for you soon. And I'm amazed at your knitting productivity in such stressful times!

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  4. So sorry to hear all this....sending you lots of love!

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  5. Things just have to get better for you guys.....and SOON!!!

    hugs {{{ }}}

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  6. Oh boy, Rhoda... sounds like you need a vacation from your life. ASAP! Hang in there... yikes. I know the pain of living with parents. Not pretty.

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  7. Can't wait to see the pictures! :) Hello from PEAR!

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  8. That's great news for you guys. I hope you find a place soon (for your sanity!) Will you be far from your family?? Do you want to remain close, just not IN their house?

    ((((hugs))))

    Can't wait to see your cowl!

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  9. Relationships with parents are so complicated and difficult at times. I had to move back in with my mom for nearly a year when I was 37. I very nearly strangled her with my own two hands, and we're still not really on speaking terms.

    I hope you can find a home of your own soon, and find some peace in the meanwhile. Deep breaths, knitting meditation.

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  10. I so understand you on this one. I think it is a cultural factor and unfortunately we get caught in the middle. Oh the things we have to talk about! I will email you. Hugs!

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Hey everyone,
Just wanted to thank you for taking the time out to leave me a comment. Happy reading!